Where is the love?

How did I love powerlifting the day of the APA meet? Let me count the ways. Even after nearly bombing out on bench and struggling way too much with deadlift I loved it like a kid loves candy stores and Christmas. I couldn’t wait to get started training again.

Then things got hard. Pain caught up with me, motivation lagged, I lost my mojo. The sparkly new infatuation with powerlifting left when the honeymoon phase ended.

Here’s where I’ll learn how dedicated I am. I’ll fly to the gym on cloud nine when I’m working toward a goal. Will I work as hard when I’m struggling to just maintain my current strength? Without a prize in sight, will I put in the painful work with the lacrosse ball and the stick and the PVC roller that now make up about half my workout time? With only a slim chance of breaking another record next month will I still feel the love?

I’m starting to think the records go not to the woman who’s the strongest physically — but to the one most willing to face the pain, to work when it’s not always thrilling, to carry on when the sweat pours from digging a lacrosse ball into a hot mess of muscle instead of from pushing through a max effort squat.

I’ve learned I’m strong — strong enough to lift heavy weights. It’s time to prove to myself now that I’m strong enough to keep going even when I’m not getting what I want.  Because pushing through is the only road to getting back to the love. And that’s what I want!


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